I was reading this Times article on revamping your wardrobe for summer until I had to stop. Partly because it was annoying me, but mostly because it was boring me to tears. If I wanted to be subjected to a lecture on what I should and shouldn't wear, I'd just wear knee-high socks and Goth platform boots in my parents' presence. Sheesh.
Here is a list of Zen's fashion dos and don'ts.
- Be lured into the delusion that leggings are an acceptable substitute for trousers. I mean, sure, wear leggings as trousers if you want. Just know that if you do that in my presence, I will be judging you. And by judging you, I mean judging your ASS.
- Listen to anybody else on what you should be wearing. If it makes you happy, then wear it. Obviously this don't is subject to the first don't, and this is perfectly fair and logical because it is always, always a good idea to keep your buttcheeks to yourself.
- Screw 'em and have fun.
Simple, straightforward, easy to remember. The Times should get me to write these things for them.
P. S. It has just occurred to me that we skirt dangerously close to treating leggings -- or even worse, tights! -- as trousers in certain of our shop shoots. Oh dear. It just goes to show you that you should never lay down a fashion rule; it will always inevitably come round to bite you in the (exposed) ass.